Naked and jobless

Normally, at 6:54 pm on a Monday, I am certainly not recently post shower naked, writing a blog, and dreading putting on clothing in this sweltering hades we call Utah. Also, I am usually not a part of the 10+ percent of Americans who are currently unemployed. No, today is certainly an abnormal day, to say the least.

Let me tell you what it means to work in corporate mega chain restaurant America.

Apparently, a manager can tell a female that she has terrific, big boobs in front of several males, and also the female with said big boobs, with little or no consequence. Or he can tell a girl that she "needs to lose some weight," because she said she can't get her fingers down into the wine glasses to properly polish them. Or he can wrap his arms around a male employee and proceed to, for lack of a better way to say it, hump said employee, saying "**** just needs a hug, and a hump." Or he can tell another employee that he finds his wife attractive, because she isn't like other girls, she has "some meat on her bones." Or he can look at porn in the office. Or about 100 other things. He can get 2 corporate complaints, and chance after chance after chance. And after all that...what happens to him? Waaaaaiiiit for it........drum roll please.....ba dum da da dum boo beep boo....
A transfer to another store in Vegas.

My, how it kicks ass to be a Corporate mega chain restaurant manager. Apparently, sitting in his basement, looking at orc porn and playing World Of Warcraft for hours on end has somehow lent him freakishly potent powers of persuasion, and a slimy, snakelike ability to slither his way out of a sticky situation. That, or corporate mega chain restaurant America is more concerned with keeping their investment, than with actually meeting out punishment in the vile mire that is acceptable restauranteur jargon. Where anything goes, as long as somebody else is saying it too.

Working in corporate mega chain restaurant America means that, if such a person as the aforementioned dirt ball happens to be your manager, and happens to commit all (and many, many more) of the previously stated infractions, and then gets transferred to another store, the remaining proprietor will defend said bag of shit, to the tune of firing at least 3 employees.

Working in corporate mega chain restaurant America means that the previously described bag of douche can have endless opportunities to say all manner of vile things to or about employees. However, if one of these employees happens to mention just how spectacular a dickbot this porn loving creature happens to be on Facebook AFTER said fiend has been transferred, in RESPONSE to the firings of 2 fellow friends...well folks, we have yet another corporate mega chain restaurant fatality.

Working in corporate mega chain restaurant America ultimately means, that money is more important than people. That sticking up for a man who can't get through a shift without making someone feel uncomfortable is more important than people. That bending over backwards for customers is more important that taking care of YOUR people. That maintaing a clean managerial image is more important than people. Even when these people you dump on are the ones who brought you success.

Working in corporate mega chain restaurant America means YOU don't matter. Only the money matters.

Which, upon reviewing this little rant, I imagine the first comment will be,

"No shit buddy."


Dave said...

No shit buddy.

Nikki said...

Double...no shit buddy.

alex aulelio shahan said...

orc porn is THE BEST

Dave said...

To Shahan:

No shit buddy.