8.12.09

A christmas miracle

Every now and then the Virgin Mary appears in a tree trunk. Or on a tortilla. Or some other miraculous location not involving a tattooed chest. When such an event occurs, the Catholic community often erects some form of a shrine to protect the location of the holy appearance. Although, in the case of the Virgin in the tortilla, I am not sure what they did with that. Perhaps it has been preserved in some sort of a frozen sanctuary.

I used to think that such things were just silly coincidences. Until I had my own such experience.

Last night I was at work. Sometimes, when bored and hungry, I cut the middle out of a loaf of bread and eat it. I typically only do this toward the end of the night, when we have an overabundance of bread left over, which shall soon be tossed out anyway. I am not a completely amoral person, simply cutting out the middle of an entire loaf of bread when there are starving people all over the state, nay, world.

After consuming the center piece, I was left with a doughnut shaped husk, which still contained about an inch and a half of soft center bread. So I dug out most of what remained with 3 fingers. One of my co-workers, Jen, who happens to be my arch nemesis, had a plate of food in the back. She being nowhere in sight, I placed the chunk of middle-bread on her plate, surmising that she would probably enjoy it with her meal.

Moments later, she approached me, asking what it was supposed to be. I replied that I didn't know what the hell she was talking about. She said, "You mean you didn't do that on purpose?"
"Do what on purpose?"
"This."
And then she showed me the miracle.

Unknowingly, my hand had been blessed upon extracting the middle-bread. This perfectly formed creature, possibly a sheep or a cow, was unwittingly sculpted by my apparently holy hand. With Christmas being very near, this can be none other than one of the stable animals that was present at the birth of our Lord. Perhaps the cow, who lent its manger. Or the sheep, who provided a measure of wool for the manger lining.

I may have to reconsider the enmity shared between me and my nemesis. This may have been a sign to bury the hatchet. Although, if that were the case, I would think that I'd have extracted a dove from the center of the bread, rather than a sheep/cow.

I'm so confused.