3.5.08

To much educations

I think we, as Americans, need to stop complaining about the illegal immigration problem and start pro actively fixing the it. This is a self inflicted conundrum, you see. Allow me to elaborate.

The reason why such an absurd amount of people crawl, swim, and sneak their way into this country is because there is an over-abundance of work.

What? How can this be? We are in an economic slump, for goodness sakes. Unemployment is up. How can one claim that there are ubiquitous employment opportunities in this country, enough so that hundreds of thousands of illegal immigrants are employed every year? Because they are doing the jobs that nobody else desires to do. This, however is not a new argument. The true source of the problem-- the rotting, putrescent root, has been misidentified.

Parents are the problem. The school system is the problem. Here's why.

All throughout a child's young life, he or she generally grows up grossly misinformed. Children are told that they are smart, that they can do or be anything. This is a devious fabrication on multiple levels. What happens when the young creature surprises his or her parents with the announcement that, "hey, I wanna work at the Jiffy Lube and change oil as my future career." Or, "I've decided that being a beet farmer is a logical career choice. High school is enough for me." Suddenly, the parental figure becomes alarmed. How can this be? My child cannot possible desire to invest his or her life in such a lowly trade. Why, little Cletus needs to be a doctor, or a lawyer, something more noble.

Apparently little Cletus can not do anything he wants. (I am sick of the he/she nonsense, I am going to stick with he.) The endless possibilities mantra obviously only applies to trades of a highly educated order.

Which brings me to another point. Children are too coddled, too pampered. This is dangerous, due to the fact that overindulging them with wanton praise and adoration may lead them to think that, no matter what, anything is possible. Well, sometimes things just aren't possible. For example.

A child might excel in sporting endeavors. Parents, instead of heaping upon the child endless greasy fawning, should be a bit more practical. "Hey, you know Cletus, you sure are good at running with a ball and knocking people over. But you should be aware that a car crash could change all of that in the blink of an eye. Or if a shark bit off your legs, it would all be over. Then where would you be? Same as all the rest of the kids who just don't try. Only they wouldn't miss their legs so much. Do you really want to miss them that much?" Much safer. That way, children never try too terribly hard and are never greatly disappointed.

"Mom? I think I wanna go to Harvard." A parent might wisely respond, "Well Cletus, that might work out for you. Unless of course you fall out of a tree, the impact rendering you mentally deficient, thus sealing your fate as a potato picker." Children need to understand that there is nothing wrong with being a potato picker, whether mentally deficient or not. And that they might fall out of trees. Or something.

What happened to the good old days, when fathers taught their sons the family smelting trade? Why does everyone have to go to college? Why are parents horrified at the thought of their children apprenticing honest trades, such as milk men, pool cleaners, or lawn care services? This is the reason why unemployment is up. Mom and Dad have convinced little Cletus that he is above such menial tasks. Therefore, rather than filling a spot in said type of labor, Cletus gets an education. Maybe Cletus really isn't so intelligent. Let's be honest. Any idiot can get a degree these days. The problem lies in the fact that, due to having a degree, our brave Cletus feels like he is above the many "uneducated jobs" that exist, therefore creating the demand for labor, which is subsequently filled by our amigos from across the border. Why does he feel this way? Because mom, dad, and the public school system convinced him that he was just too damn special to run a back-hoe.

If we really want to solve the illegal immigration problem, we need to eliminate the excess menial labor opportunities. If, after sneaking across the border, illegal aliens found that their situation was just as hopelessly destitute here as in Mexico, due to a lack of jobs, they would simply stop coming. No need for a fence. Or a moat. Or sea monsters in the moat. This can only be made possible if our American parents teach their children that they really aren't so special. That the Abe Lincoln "Pass it on" billboard that says "Failed, failed, failed, and then..." should continue "...got blasted in the head for trying. Beware of trying."

Less educated Americans with a lower level of self worth= fewer illegal immigrants. Simple as that.

Pass it on.

3 comments:

Snubbs the White Rabbit said...

Haha, dude I hope this is mostly tongue in cheek. I think the great thing about this country is that one can come from the slums and if he aspires to it, can become whatever he wants. True its not true for a lot of people, but if you have the know how and the determination, the sky really is the limit. Thats what makes this country better than most other countries. I think a lot more goes into a college degree than you are remembering. Not that it was nearly impossible, but a lot of hard work and hours went into my degree. But as you said, mostly anyone can get a degree if they are willing to put in the effort. I agree with what you are saying though, there is nothing wrong with not aspiring to higher education, but those people should be waiting with there hands out either. I think this country was built on a foundation that had open doors to those around the world. Maybe the time has come to close those doors. Or maybe not. Every time I have been to Mexico I think to myself,"Man that would suck to live here. No wonder they come to America." So maybe immigration isn't the problem. I would like to think I would feel a lot better about Mexicans or whoever coming to this country if they took the proper channels to get naturalized such as learning the language, paying taxes, and not getting into trouble with the law. Just a few thoughts...

Fish Nat!on said...

Satire.

Brady and Laura said...

The problem is that illegal immigration is just too convenient for us all. We get our 99 cent hamburgers and dollar knick knacks due to the ridiculously cheap labor. No one in their right mind will work for the price that some immigrants will, they'd rather not work at all and just collect the welfare and unemployment checks. At the same time the immigrants are loving life , making triple what they did in their native countries. Its a love/hate relationship. In the end its a lose/lose situation, if we hire non-immigrants to work those jobs we have to pay them a few dollars more an hour, which means that the price of goods has to go up. Which is the lesser of the evils? Inflation or unemployment?
I find it ironic that a constant effort is made to build bigger and better borders as to not let immigrants in, while at the same time we are extending our borders to other countries through globalization.
I would say that welfare is the downfall of this nation, it rewards those who choose not to try at all.