Food slaves

We human beings put such horrible things into our bodies. Really. I am quite guilty of this, although I do attempt to be moderate in the fatty vile sludge with which I inundate my body. I watch out for trans fats. In fact, I am terrified of them. If ever I eat something and then happen to look at the package afterwards and I see that most evil of ingredients "trans fat," dripping with venom, blood, and death, I freak out a little. Even worse, when I come across something that I have eaten a great deal of throughout my life, and come to find out it is loaded with trans fats...I just imagine my heart valves plugged and ready to seize up at any moment.

I allowed my roommate to talk me into eating at Lon's Cookin' Shack today for lunch. All manner of fatty meats, hydrogenated oils, and deep fried vegetables. Such as fried cauliflower. As though that particular vegetable wasn't already useless and practically nutrientless by itself. As I gorged myself upon pulled pork, garlic mashers, and what I assumed was really healthy mac and cheese, I noticed the people around me. Now, I think that at any given time and pretty much any place in America, one might look around and see plenty of over weight people milling about. This is pretty normal. But being surrounded by people who are morbidly obese is a bit of a rarity. People who are hanging out around 4 bills--you just don't see concentrated groups of them.

Unless, of course, you are eating at Lon's.

Now, don't take this post the wrong way. I am not writing with a mocking, fun-poking tone. I think it is horrifying and sad. So, as I was sitting there stuffing my gullet, I couldn't help but observe that at least half of the patrons were morbidly obese. Not just overweight, but painfully obese. Like, walking over to refill the 32 oz coke at the machine looks painful, obese. I guess I just can't understand how people do what they do to themselves. You may be thinking, "Well hey. You don't have that problem so you don't understand. You have skinny genes, and therefore can't understand what these people go through."

That argument is, for the most part, bullshit. I realize that genes to play a roll, but it isn't all encompassing. I watch what I eat. I mean, at 10 o'clock at night, I wanna shove all of the ice cream, crepes, and brownies down my gullet that I can, just as much as the next guy. But I exercise a little self control. Every time I eat out, I would love to down 3 pepsi's. Instead, I force myself to drink water, even though I want that filthy black liquid more than anything. I think about buying cookies at the grocery store. Then I look at the package, see that eating 2 of them provides one with a good hearty 14 grams of fat, and I put the package down and walk away. I try (and often fail) to at least be moderately active. None of these things are easy for me. I have a rather lazy and indolent nature. I love food more than just about anything. I struggle with all of those things, but I do my best.

What I don't understand, is at what point people just simply give up. Is it not obvious that when one can barely fit through the door, that it is really time to quit patronizing Lon's multiple times per week? I just think it's so sad, and I feel bad for those people because I don't know how they can be happy. Food rules their lives. Food regulates how fast they can move, how much it hurts to move, whether or not they can fit in a single airplane seat, or a movie theater seat. Food dictates what they wear, where they must shop, how they feel about themselves, how others feel about them, how much they pay for health insurance, if they can even get health insurance. These people are food slaves, and it is one of the most unfortunate things occurring in America today.

What can be done? Perhaps nothing by larger society, because nobody can force anyone to take charge of their own lives. Welfare is a shining example of that. Is banning trans fats the answer? Is forcing fast food companies to adhere to absurd regulations it? Those ideas are starting to take hold, and it is scary. More and more, people want the government to take charge of more and more aspects of our lives. The government is slowly sapping away people's accountability. Poor? It's not your fault! It's those filthy rich capitalists holding you down. Obese? Not your fault either, but that of wicked fast food corporations.

I'm sick of a country full of people who won't take responsibility for anything. In the end, we are all just pointing our fat, poor, unsuccessful, greedy, angry, oil guzzling, hypocritical, big shady governmental fingers at a mirror. We have no one to blame but ourselves.


Anonymous said...


Fish, you've really come into your own as a writer. Fantastic. This should be published.

BTW this is Dave.

chris almond said...

i am going to put you into a bottle of Tabasco sauce.

Katie said...

Wow. Well written, but a little harsh for my taste.

Texie said...

So you have no idea who I am but I came accross your blog through one of my friends and your blog is absolutely comical. I could read it all day it is so funny! You seem like a pretty cool person that could make me laugh all day! Good writing skills by the way!

karen said...

Great post - couldn't have said it better myself. Free choice must rule, even if our choices are poor ones. Take that away, and we have nothing. Education is key, but even that isn't a fail safe. People won't always make good choices, but unless there's such a thing as personal accountability, there's even less reason to do do. You give me hope, Fish. Love your blog! It's wise, funny, and irreverant, all at the same time.

Estee Cook said...

how do you feel about eating an entire bag of rolls in one sitting?

just wondering.


Snubbs the White Rabbit said...

Well said friend. I assume you have read Fast Food Nation. Very interesting book. A little biased but interesting reading. I couldn't agree more with your thought about people in this country taking responsibility for their own actions.

Fish Nat!on said...

Dear Estee. Not an entire bag. Only 8, spread over a 9 hour period. Less than 1 roll per hour.
Love, Fish

Gina Lee said...

amen brother