23.7.08

Sneak attack from hell

I'm growing quite weary of driving by BYU stadium of late. Not simply because I mostly hate that school/think football is a retarded waste of life/money/brain cells/time. My annoyance is caused by the gigantic stadium of fire advertisement with Mylie Cyrus' face plastered all over the side. It isn't even the fact that I have to look at her over and over again. I mean, I feel just as creepy as the next guy for checking out a jumbo-tron photo of a 17 year old day after day, but even that shame I can live with.

It is the simple fact that Mylie Cyrus exists. That there is such prodigious market for the musical slop that,,,,euashlkasel;;;a;laakl....ok, so I just felt something crawling on my arm that I assumed was an ant. An occasional rogue ant has been infiltrating my bed of late. I looked down and it was a spider. A freaking bloody spider. Let me go ahead and admit that there is nothing more frightening to me than a spider. Especially one crawling upon my body. Ugh. There is probably a whole nest of them somewhere in here.

Well. I have probably pretty much ruined this post. No, that effing crawling spawn of Lucifer ruined it. Oh well. Bear with.

So as I was saying before I was attacked. The fact that some little no talent (being a hot 17 year old/having mediocre singing ability does not count as talent) teenager is headlining shows all over the country that sell out within minutes of the start of ticket sales is sickening. Think of all the raw talent out there that you know personally. People who actually write/create their own unique music, but will never get out of the local circuit. It is tragic that Miley Cyrus is outselling just about any band out there, all because Billy Ray mullet face Cyrus has managed to prostitute her to the Disney corporation.

So on this poster you have Miley, Glen Beck, and then the Blue Man Group, who occupy a very small corner of the poster. Really? It is simply tragic to me that a group as amazing and talented as Blue Man has to fall under Miley's barely pubescent shadow.

You know what? I don't even care anymore. I can't get over that spider violating my arm. I keep feeling something crawling on me.

Congratulations universe. You win.

6 comments:

Estee Cook said...

i like this...i also like miley...sooo...

karen said...

Scott's afraid of spiders too. Just ask him. And I think Miley Cyrus is stupid on a college campus - isn't she supposed to appeal to 7 year olds??

Carla said...

Love you fish, but you gotta get your facts straight...

1. It's Miley, not Mylie
2. She's 15
3. And she's not even hot

Anyhow, amen to your rantings. I vote we establish operation remove miley poster, right after we go back and steal the IMAX batman poster.

Snubbs the White Rabbit said...

My mom said right, I HATE spiders. In fact I hate all bugs. Miley Cyrus seriously sucks man. But, I can't blame her. Mainstream music in general sucks. There are a handful of bands played on the radio that actually have talent.

Gina Lee said...

SiCk! I hate spiders and thanks to you, it feels like they are crawling on my arms as well!
The first time I heard Miley on the radio, I almost started laughing. I can't believe she's famous! Her music stinks like a homeless man on a hot summer day. I'm assuming that's bad.

jen said...

um.. yeah, maybe you don't feel shameful for checking out a so-called "hot" (not really) 17 year old.. but she's fifteen. Right now you should feel like you have very bad taste in what hot is as well as a pedophile. Still love you though :)