Colin gave me a present a few days ago, and I think it is probably my favorite thing that anyone has ever given me. I pulled into our driveway after work, just as he had returned home from a trip to IKEA. He bought like...a million plants. Anyway, he approached my car with his arms hidden behind him and told me that he brought me a surprise, and bade me guess what it was.
"A chihuahua?" Because I wanted more than anything for it to be a tiny, gray chihuahua.
Not a chihuahua.
At that point, I was about to say "A beaver?" But instead just decided to give up, assuming that I would simply continue to guess incorrectly. "I don't know. What is it?" At which point, he pulled a beaver from behind his back. A plush beaver. I then was probably the happiest I've been in weeks.
Beavers are absolutely my favorite animal. I mean come on. They chop down trees with their faces for goodness sakes. And then build dams and houses. What other animal in the whole kingdom builds a beaver den that floats in the water? None animals, and that's why it is called a beaver lodge, and not a tree cutting animal lodge. Because only beavers cut down trees. With their faces.
So, am I a 26 year old man who sleeps with a stuffed beaver named Hot Pocket? You're damn right I am.
And he has crazy eye.