18.11.08

Frat bros

I haven't spent a whole lot of time around frat guys, but on the few occasions in which I have found myself in their presence, there seems to always be one striking common denominator. Well, besides the beer and mild to thorough retardation. And the scoring of chicks. And the high fives and fist pounding. I guess there are a lot of quintessential elements to the frat bro. But there was one that was at the forefront of my mind as I left the Jazz game on Monday night.

We had $5 upper bowl tickets. For whatever reason, the upper bowl at a Jazz game (and I would assume any sporting event) fills up with all manner of drunken morons, shouting obscenities and really a whole lot of things that don't make sense to average human beings. Lots of fist pumping, booing, and personal insults towards the players 200 feet below. Also lots of scandalized Mormon families who thought it would be a good idea to take the kids to a Jazz game for family night. I suppose the fact that a cup of beer is more expensive than the upper bowl seats has a lot to do with who is sitting up there. If the frat dudes and other sport loving miscreants sit in the five dollar seats, they can still possibly afford to get wasted.

There were 5 or 6 particularly rowdy frat dudes sitting in front of us. Whenever something went well for the Jazz, we would cheer and they would turn around for high fives and fist pounds. At one point towards the end of the game, we started chanting USA, to which the frat bros wholeheartedly joined. Throughout the whole night, we were not so subtly mocking them. So here is the common denominator; frat bros never catch on when one is making fun of them. They really never do. I don't want to sound cocky or pretentious, but if someone is mocking me or my friends...I figure it out. But for some reason, these meat heads just never get it. As long as you are joining in the fist pounding, and say, "Hell yeah!" a lot, they remain clueless. Like small children.

Perhaps I am a jerk for mocking them, but common. When one of them has a tattoo on his forearm that says, "Without struggle, there can be no progress," and he's WHITE, mockery is warranted. Or when a girl asks to see his arm in order to read the tattoo, and he instead holds up his opposite and sort of flexes and says, "Pretty huge huh?" Doi. Mockery is absolutely justified.

Maybe I really am being too harsh. I mean, the frat bro with the Skin industries shirt was probably just kidding when he urged his fellow brethren to keep the cups so that they could play beer pong later on.

3 comments:

Joliene said...

Frat boys are everything that is wrong with the world.

Did a guy seriously do that with his arm? Oh man, I straight up laugh at men like that. Ridiculous.

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Petey said...

God wouldn't have mad Frat Bros if he didn't want you to mock them.